Self Management

Basic Self-Management skills are valuable in stressful situations.

Learning how to care for yourself will benefit you and the people around you. 

Self-Management starts with honest self-assessment.


In my view Self-Management has to do with staying on track and doing the regular maintenance needed to look after yourself.

This means at work, at home, at play, wherever you go.


Do you show up in all areas of your life with enough energy and clarity to do what is needed from your coworkers, family and friends?


What kind of self-management tools do you use to maintain your health?


If you have gone through my Positive Psychology module you will have learned about your signature strengths and how to use those to address places where you struggle.

You will also have discovered areas that come up as lowest ranking strengths for you.


There are many other forms of self assessment available like Myers-Briggs etc. I think the Positive Psychology Values in Action Survey is the best, and it’s free.


The Relaxation Response

The Relaxation Response can actually allow us to access the reasoning parts of our brain (prefrontal cortex) that acute stress or fear can keep us from accessing.

The Biopsychosocial model

Thinking of our health in a biopsychosocial model is often helpful.

What I mean by this is that our Body is our Biology our Mind is our Psychology and our relationships are our Social well being.  A bit of work in any of these areas may well effect the other areas as they are, of course, intertwined.


Body

Getting enough sleep, eating well and getting some exercise is common good advice.

Recognize that taking breaks regularly is good for you and actually increases productivity.

Check in with your healthcare provider if you have concerns about your health, mental or physical.


Mind

Science has learned a lot in recent years about Nero plasticity and how we learn.

Our brain looks to save energy and will deploy previous methods (well worn neural pathways) when confronted with similar events seen in the past.

The good news is, we can shape these neural pathways and use more of our brain power to our benefit.    

Practicing calming the mind through breathing and grounding exercises can save us from hyper focusing or becoming overly vigilant due to worry and can be enormously helpful in dealing with stressful situations.

The Relaxation Response can actually allow us to access the reasoning parts of our brain (prefrontal cortex) that acute stress or fear can keep us from accessing.  Repetitive negative thoughts can act as a stressor and cause our focus to narrow and make it harder to enjoy life.  The Relaxation Response can really  help with this.  Allow yourself the opportunity to Broaden and Build a more positive experience of life.

 

Relationships 

Connecting with people in meaningful ways is part of being human.

This has been harder to do since the global pandemic restriction have been keeping us apart.  Doing what we can to connect over zoom for a virtual coffee, on the phone or safely in person has a positive impact on our health and brings our lives meaning.


Process of Self Forgiveness

Since my main focus here is on personal mental well-being, 

I will offer a Process of Self Forgiveness.


Holding onto self resentment is bad for your health.

Forgiveness is a choice that has major benefits.

Whether you have old feelings of pain, resentment or in forgiveness towards yourself from letting yourself down or someone else, whether you feel like you should have seen something earlier or acted differently, you can keep the learning and let go of the resentment or animosity.


Say the following out loud with intention.



Be as specific as possible with the wrongs if there are certain memories that come up. Make a statement about a particular event if one comes to mind.

No need to search for all of them. Just deal with the big stuff and whatever else comes to mind.


Continue with the Forgiveness Protocol until you feel a sense of release in your physical body. This might be huge, including tears of relief, or simply a lightness or a sense that it's accomplished. 

Now you're ready to say the final statement of the protocol, again with intention: